Ok. I'll ask the obvious question. Since when are gays allowed to own property?

So yeah, I'm a lazy ass. But, things are looking up. I've decided not to wait for funny moments or profound revelation. Just letting it all out.

Work has been interesting...especially with the little suspension not too long ago. But, I'm back and kissing that ass just like new. On my first day back, I got shopped. aarrggghhh. Basically every once in a while, some random party comes in with a list of about a bazillion things to listen for, look for, time, blah blah blah. Then they go home and we hope to god their memory is better than the three other schmucks we've had the last three months. Just my humble opinion. This time I got lucky. Fun people. Fun meal. Fun times. Low maintanence. Didn't trash the booth. No food stuck in the seats. No condiments emptied onto the table. No complete and total shredding of all napkins within two time zones. Didn't demand free food because their booth was dirty. And...a 25% tip. Lucky me.

Well, I'm headed back to good ole Lansing, Michigan this summer. Something must have gone right for the new coaching staff at Michigan State to ask me back to coach their summer volleyball camps. It's a pretty sweet deal for me. Room and board (in air conditioning, no less), a pair of Nike's, another half dozen MSU t-shirts, a pretty damn respectable paycheck and...THE SALAD BAR. Did I mention the salad bar? Now, for all those who have experienced, then hated college dorm food, when we move into our own apartments we find that preparing about 100 different things to choose from at every meal is...for the love of god...just not going to happen. Preparing 2 things to eat at every meal is...for the love of god...just too hard to handle. Really people...dorm food is a godsend. (That was a good buzz....I talked to Jesus). All I know for sure, besides what I learned in kindergarten...is that I can weigh my salad by the pound at Pick N Save and come up with the exact amount to pay without getting near the scale.

All I know for sure is that the salad bar in the Michigan State dorms rocks my world. Not so sure that the airplane I get into at least four times a year is going to land in one piece. But I do know that the Wonders Hall salad bar is my rock. So basically, the Michigan State volleyball camps have been my version of fat camp. Salad twice a day (alright, the occasional Jimmy Johns...vege sub I might add), about 20 gazillion miles of walking (sometimes to get my one of a hundred coffees a day), seven hours of coaching, a couple of hours of playing pickup games with the other coaches...and the occasional libation. Hey, I've gotta walk across the street to the Pub...that counts as exercise right?

So, I just got a bunch of back issues of my high school alumni magazine with all of its alumni updates. Basically at least two people in every class since...I swear to you...1924...write about what everyone's doing. There's the usual pictures of weddings, reunions, parties, yadda yadda yadda. But, after reading through three Punahou Bulletins I decided I would forgo forking over $700 for a roundtrip ticket home for my class' reunion. First off, it's a little intimidating reading about the half dozen or so people who went to Athens...not as spectators...but as athletes representing the United States in about four different sports. Then, there were the people who've just returned from presenting their films at Cannes or receiving their Ph.D.s from Columbia. Or maybe, the actors in a new series or models in some show in Europe. Maybe it was a picture of a former Miss Hawaii performing her talent segment at the Miss America pageant. Or maybe it's the fact that about half the people I read about have different last names or new wives...and not the Boston/New Paltz/Toronto kind. But, that's me being sour grapes. Learn, live, love. Good enough for me. Do they have the Wonder's Hall salad bar? I think not.